Thursday, February 08, 2007

Dorks Riff And You Have Walt Whitman To Thank For It


A transcription of an IM conversation from this morning NOT edited for spelling, grammar etc.


Flannery: How you doin'?


Big Orange: 咻~~~(一陣冷風吹過,好冷喔~~)

Big Orange: 啊~~~那會怎樣(台語)!

Big Orange: how you?


Flannery: so far so good


Big Orange: actually, yes.

Big Orange: I love Dr. [name withheld]

Big Orange: no swelling, no pain


Flannery: cool


Big Orange: didn't even FEEL anything during the operation thanx to the IV valium!!


Flannery: awesome


Big Orange: oh, and old tech is still good tech.

Big Orange: that is, an old fashioned ice bag is a wonderful thang.

Big Orange: and a helluva lot cheaper than those chemical ice packs.

Big Orange: hehehehe///


Flannery: true


Big Orange: I woke up with a half poem in my head.

Big Orange: I'm trying to see if I can write it.... wanna see what I have so far?


Flannery: sure


Big Orange: Come gather ‘round, pull up a chair, and listen my friends

To a tale about my most recent event

a happening that made my heart most content,

the cutting of my vas deferens.

Flannery: oh, jesus


Big Orange: I thought I'd try covering ALL the blogs...

Big Orange: so you like it so far??

Big Orange: I'll work on it.

Big Orange: can I send it to you for editing??


Flannery: I feel like I've been listening to a reality show about your vasectomy!!!


Big Orange: yup!

Big Orange: you get the play-by-play AND the colour commentary!

Big Orange: hehehehehehe!!

Big Orange: I told Doc a lil' bit about it and he thinks there is much material to be mined therewithin.


Flannery: I think I could do my phd on the subject; my knowledge is so intimate


Big Orange: ESPEICIALLY when I told him that the MD's office was an old HOUSE

Big Orange: AND that four old, old guys were milling around the porch and coming outside, all walkin' reaaal funny and bent over.


Flannery: I'm done picturing your balls and the workings therein


Big Orange: one old motherfucker could barely walk-- like he'd been repeatedly KICKED in the balls-- and was wearing an eyepatch!


Flannery: well, you are in the south

Big Orange: I seriously thought about chickening out for a moment there.

Big Orange: well, yeah....


Flannery: well, you are a big chicken


Big Orange: that's troo...

Big Orange: remember the surgery in "Batman" where the Joker got patched up??


Flannery: not really

Big Orange: well, there we go.


Flannery: why don't you ask Doc to edit your poem?


Big Orange: hehehehe.

Big Orange: OK.


Flannery: let me know when you are moved to write about flowers...or ovaries


Big Orange: anyway, valium is wonderful.


Flannery: word


Big Orange: I could write about ovaries.

Big Orange: there's a new sterilzation process for wimmin-folken that doens't involve surgery.

Big Orange: is that interesting to you?


Flannery: nope

Flannery: oh, wait...new wardrobes?


Big Orange: no... falopian tube implants

Big Orange: you wanted to know when I was moved to write about ovaries, but when I ask if you're interested, you say nope.

Flannery: do i contradict myself? then i contradict myself! I am vast; I contain multitudes


Big Orange: you know, a whorehouse would contain multidudes....


Flannery: a food court contains multifoods


Big Orange: a naturist camp contains multinudes...


Flannery: a bi-polar person contains multimoods


Big Orange: a college frat house on keg night contains multispeweds

Big Orange: aaaand Christian churches at Lent will contain....

Big Orange: uh....

Big Orange: multiescheweds


Flannery: a vegas wedding chapel might contain multiwooeds


Big Orange: a mass jail break would might produce multieludes....


Flannery: A model-maker would collect multiglueds


Big Orange: back to the whorehouse: MULTISCREWEDS!!

Big Orange: a hair salon: MULTISHAMPOOEDS!!

Big Orange: an orthodox Jewish Synagogue: MULTISNOODS!!

Big Orange: a Hollywood movie set: MULTICUED!!

Big Orange: a room full of pathological liars: MULTIDELUDES!!


Flannery: a bad movie: multibooeds


Big Orange: a thorazine clinic: MULTISUBDUEDS


Flannery: hee!

Flannery: a house with many fireplaces: multiflued

Flannery: many flashers: multilewds


Big Orange: a whole collection of carnival sideshow barkers in the same room....

Big Orange: ::ahem::

Big Orange: MULTIBALLYHOOED!!

Big Orange: back to the prison break: MULTIPERSUED!!

Big Orange: a dozen soup kitchen cooks would be MULTISTEWED

Big Orange: so would a roomful of drunks...

Big Orange: ah! 25 cubist painters in the same room: MULTISKEWED!!

Big Orange: how did we overlook the lawfirm: MULTISUED!!

Big Orange: or a quadrouple rainbow: MULTIHUED!!

Big Orange: a middle school: MULTIATTIDUDE!

Big Orange: an outdoors/watersports sports store: MULTICANOED!!

Big Orange: a pig farm manure pit: MULTIPOOED!

Big Orange: same thing with a Disney Store....

Big Orange: MULTIPOOHED.


Flannery: hee!

Flannery: or many cagey people: multialludes

Flannery: or saturday mornings; multicartooned

Flannery: racetraces: multivroooms


Big Orange: hehehehehe!!


Flannery: or ren-faire people: multipantalooned

Flannery: or shipwreck survivors: multimarooned


And then Big Orange had to lie down.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

no no no, no need to thank us, we do this as a public service!!

Anonymous said...

and hey, if you can play with your food and play with your friends, you should be able to play with your LANGUAGE, too!!

Doc said...

I find this to be a very interesting exchange, but what are the little squares at the begining and why are some in ()?

Just wondering.

Doc

Pezda's Ghost said...

That's great. How about a house full of the ill: Multiflued. Or Jack Hannah: Multizooed, an old piano: Multituned. Ah, sorry.

Jenny Jenny Flannery said...

Awesome, pezda! Thanks for joining in.